A Review of Amanda Rosenberg’s “That’s Mental”
Mental as Anything
If you know me, you’ll know that I’m intimate with the topic of mental illness. I co-facilitate a mental health peer support group at my church, so you could say that when Amanda Rosenberg’s That’s Mental came up on my plate, I was hungry to read it. When I finally sat down with the book, I must have been ravenous because I read it basically in two sittings. It’s a funny book, but incredibly on point about what it’s like to live with a mental illness and all of the highs and lows that go with it. Rosenberg is a part British, part Asian writer who writes acutely from her cultural perspective, which is refreshing and a reminder that mental illness is not an exclusively white person phenomenon. Plus, everything you wanted to know about mental illness is here, from taking medications to talk therapy and beyond.
There were two chapters that particularly stuck with me (though different readers may have different takeaways from this book). One chapter is on how people — including those with mental illness — try to offer advice on how to manage your illness. This was particularly striking for me as I’ve been at the receiving end of such advice recently, and I like Rosenberg’s take: if you have a problem, let the person with a mental illness that’s to be on the receiving end of any advice ask for it first. The other chapter that was particularly noteworthy to me was on how — even in the most well-guided workplaces — it’s hard, if not impossible, to take a mental health day. Rosenberg has some prescriptive words of wisdom on how workplaces should deal with this. However, she perceptively notes that it’s OK if you have the flu people will be imploring you to stay home from work — but when it’s something that people can’t see, they just don’t understand it. A lot will have to change in society if we want to get to where the author wants to go.
Before I go any further, I should note that this is a difficult book to review. A lot of it is written in a personal memoir style, so the challenge is in being critical without being critical of the author. Even though I really genuinely enjoyed this book — and laughed out loud at many of its passages — the author does play some cards close to her chest. She writes fleetingly of being estranged from her Asian mother who looked at her daughter’s illness more as a character flaw, but doesn’t really go there in great detail. The author also notes that she had two suicide attempts, but she talks about it all surface-like. I can completely understand why the author chose to not be so revealing, and genuinely sympathize with that editorial decision. After all, there are things that I, as a human being, don’t want to talk about in a public forum. Still, be prepared for a book that strives to be somewhat darkly humourous at the expense of not being terribly revealing about personal details. Some readers may see the humour as a bit of a deflection from deeper, more serious concerns. That being said, the book is unputdownable, and, once again, I emphasize that the author’s choices to raise issues fleetingly are not necessarily a knock against the author and her choices. This is her book and her story, after all. Whatever she does or does not talk about is her choice.
This is a book, ultimately, that seeks to reduce the stigmas surrounding mental illness in society among those who don’t suffer from a mental illness, and, as I read it, I imagined that it was being narrated by a stigma-crushing friend that I have who also suffers from bipolar disorder as the author does. It’s also illuminating for those who do have a mental illness. I have to wonder, after reading this book, if I, too, suffer from some kind of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) as the author does, because I engage in some of the same behaviours that the author relates having when certain thoughts creep into my head. However, I should caution that this isn’t really a book about self-diagnosis. This is rather one woman’s story of how she struggles on a day to day basis with a mental illness, and how that impacts others in her life. To that end, I found it quite touching that she includes some words from her husband in how to have a meaningful sexual relationship with other people who do not have a mental illness. This section of the book, in particular, will help those who do not suffer from mental illnesses to better understand what to do and what not to do when living with someone who does have one.
But did I say that the book is funny? It is. Quite so. The author has a slightly misanthropic streak — she is wise to not peg that on her illnesses — and it is certainly relatable. Anyone who has struggled with depression will nod their heads at the author’s stories of being invited to social gatherings, but feeling as though she didn’t want to go because she wanted to take some mental health time for herself. As a memoir about what living with mental illness looks like, the author hits some very valid notes. And you may find yourself laughing your face off in how she recounts some of these stories.
All in all, That’s Mental is a generally successful exercise. While I found that I wanted to know more about the author’s life, I also understand the need to be a bit private and secretive on what is revealed so as to not hurt herself or others in her life. On that note, it should be added that if you’re coming to this book to look for a cure, you won’t really find one. All that Rosenberg has to say — and repeatedly — is that as long as you find something that works for you that doesn’t involve harming yourself or others, it’s all good. To that end, That’s Mental is a gloriously hilarious book. This might just be the balm that some will need to help them get through the day, while others (particularly those who do not suffer from a mental illness) will have a deeper understanding of what makes a particular mind really tick. Everyone should read this book. That little act might go a long way to reducing stigma against a certain percentage of the population with a beautiful mind. All in all, if this book can do that on whatever scale, the act of writing it will have been a very glorious endeavour indeed. In the end, I’m glad to have read this. In some ways, I think I needed to.
Amanda Rosenberg’s That’s Mental: Painfully Funny Things that Drive Me Crazy About Being Mentally Ill will be published by Turner Publishing Company on November 6, 2019.
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Get in touch: zacharyhoule@rogers.com
